Table of Contents >> Show >> Hide
- Meet the Artist: Why Amanda Oleander’s Work Feels Like a Secret You’re Allowed to Keep
- The Prompt That Started It All: “Tell Me What You Do in Private”
- What Makes These 27 Illustrations So Wholesome (Even When They’re a Little Weird)
- Why We Relate So Much: The Psychology of Private Habits (Without Making It Weird)
- The Art World Angle: This Is Participatory Art in the Scroll Era
- How to Enjoy This Series Like a Human (Not a Content Machine)
- Bonus Add-On: of Real-Life “Private Things” Experiences
- Conclusion: What 27 Wholesome Illustrations Remind Us About Being Human
Everyone has a “me-only” version of themselves. Not the polished, camera-ready you. The real youdoing tiny, slightly weird, often sweet
things behind closed doors. Maybe you narrate your life like you’re in a documentary. Maybe you eat cereal out of a mug because dishes are a
social construct. Maybe you whisper “good job” to yourself after sending an email. (Honestly? Fair.)
That’s the tender, hilarious space artist Amanda Oleander decided to exploreby asking people to share what they do in private,
then turning those confessions into wholesome illustrations that feel like a warm blanket with a punchline.
The result is a set of 27 scenes that gently remind you: you’re not the only one doing adorable little goblin activities after 10 p.m.
Meet the Artist: Why Amanda Oleander’s Work Feels Like a Secret You’re Allowed to Keep
Amanda Oleander is a Los Angeles–based artist known for illustrating intimate, everyday momentsespecially the kind that rarely make it into
photo albums because the second someone points a camera at them, the magic evaporates. Her work lives in that in-between space:
ordinary-but-sacred, awkward-but-lovable, private-but-universal.
What makes her style work so well for this concept is that she doesn’t chase perfection. Her drawings are expressive, human, and emotionally
specific. The point isn’t “Look how pretty life is.” The point is “Look how real life isand wow, it’s kind of beautiful anyway.”
The Prompt That Started It All: “Tell Me What You Do in Private”
The concept is simple and brilliant: Oleander asked her audience to share the small things they do when nobody’s watchingquiet routines,
secret comforts, goofy habits, personal rituals, and tiny acts of care. Then she illustrated them.
Why This Question Hits So Hard
“What do you do in private?” sounds like a trick questionuntil you realize it’s also a permission slip.
Most of us walk around pretending we’re consistent, composed adults with matching socks and stable emotional weather.
Private life is where we admit the truth: we’re all improvising.
The genius here isn’t just the honesty. It’s the tone. These aren’t shock confessions. They’re human onessoft, funny, and often
unexpectedly kind. The illustrations become a mirror that says, “Yep, that’s a thing. And it’s okay.”
What Makes These 27 Illustrations So Wholesome (Even When They’re a Little Weird)
“Wholesome” doesn’t mean “perfect.” It means safe to be seen. These drawings celebrate everyday private moments without
teasing people for being human. That’s why they land like comfort food.
1) Tiny Rituals That Quiet the Brain
Think bedtime routines, morning routines, and “I do this every day and I didn’t realize it was a whole personality trait” routines.
Brushing teeth together. Lining up snacks on a plate the “right” way. Sitting in the same spot on the couch like it’s your assigned seat
at the Council of Relaxation.
These rituals matter because they’re small forms of control in a world that rarely asks your permission before doing something chaotic.
A little routine can feel like emotional handrails.
2) Comfort Behaviors: The Sweet Stuff We’d Never Put on a Resume
Some private habits are basically self-care in disguise. Hugging a pillow like it’s your emotional support marshmallow. Putting on a comfort
show you’ve watched 47 times because your nervous system likes familiar plots. Talking to your pet as if they’re your roommate who pays rent
in vibes.
Oleander’s illustrations don’t frame these behaviors as “cringe.” They frame them as what they are: coping, soothing, and living.
3) Private Kindness: The Stuff Nobody Sees, But It Counts
Some of the most heartwarming “things humans do in private” aren’t funnythey’re quietly brave.
Like leaving kind notes for yourself. Practicing a difficult conversation out loud. Holding someone’s hand during a hard moment when you’re both
too tired to make it poetic.
There’s a special tenderness in private kindness because it’s not performative. There’s no audience. No likes. No “Look at me being a good person.”
It’s just care, existing for its own sake.
4) Love Behind Closed Doors: Real Intimacy Isn’t Always a Movie Scene
A lot of her workespecially her broader relationship-themed illustrationshas always focused on the unglamorous side of closeness:
the everyday maintenance of being human near another human. That energy shows up here too.
Love looks like sharing space. Sharing routines. Sharing silence. Sharing the weirdness of “I’m going to do my strange little thing now,” and
your partner responding, “Same.”
Why We Relate So Much: The Psychology of Private Habits (Without Making It Weird)
Let’s get mildly nerdy (in a fun way): the reason these illustrations feel instantly relatable is because private behaviors are where we regulate
emotions, build identity, and recover from the day.
Solitude Isn’t the Same as Loneliness
Time alone can be restorativeespecially when it’s chosen and safe. Private moments can help lower the “high alert” feeling your brain carries
after dealing with school, work, group chats, news, and the general chaos of being alive in 2025.
The point isn’t isolation. It’s recharge. A little solitude can be like plugging your phone in: you’re still the same device, just
less likely to die at 3%.
Yes, Self-Talk Is a Thing. No, You’re Not Alone.
Plenty of people talk to themselvesquietly or out loudas a way to process, plan, calm down, or motivate themselves.
In the private sphere, you can rehearse life without judgment. You can pep-talk yourself through stress. You can narrate your own cooking like you’re
hosting a show called “I Have No Idea What I’m Doing, But We’re Cooking Anyway.”
Oleander’s art gently normalizes these habits. And normalization is powerful. The fastest way to reduce shame is to realize other people do it too.
Micro-Rituals Create a Feeling of Safety
When people share private habits, they often sound smalluntil you realize those small acts do big emotional work.
A ritual can signal, “I’m home.” “I’m safe.” “The day is over.” “I can be myself.”
That’s why the illustrations feel cozy: they capture the invisible labor of calming your inner world.
The Art World Angle: This Is Participatory Art in the Scroll Era
There’s also something quietly modern happening here. This isn’t just an artist making work about peopleit’s an artist making work
with people. The audience becomes a co-author.
Community as a Creative Engine
When a project starts with real submissions, the work becomes a collage of lived experiences. That’s why the scenes feel so specific:
they’re not generic “relatable content.” They’re distilled from actual human routines and emotions.
And because the stories come from many different people, the final set of illustrations becomes a kind of empathy galleryproof that
everyone has private layers, and most of them are softer than we assume.
Boundaries Matter (and Wholesome Art Respects Them)
“Private” doesn’t mean “public property.” A thoughtful project like this depends on consent, anonymity, and respect.
The magic is in sharing what feels safe to shareand keeping the rest yours. You get to choose what stays behind the curtain.
How to Enjoy This Series Like a Human (Not a Content Machine)
If you’re used to scrolling fast, this project is an invitation to slow down. These drawings work best when you let them land.
Try This: The “That’s Me” Game
As you imagine each scene, notice what you recognize. Not just the actionalso the feeling.
Is it comfort? Nervousness? Relief? Playfulness? The series is basically a personality quiz, but instead of labeling you, it hugs you.
Steal the Idea (In a Good Way): Your Own Private Moments Sketchbook
You don’t need to be a professional illustrator to try this concept yourself. You can:
- Write a list of 10 things you do in private that calm you down.
- Sketch stick figures of your nightly routine like it’s a nature documentary.
- Keep a “tiny joys” log: the mug you love, the chair you always sit in, the snack you secretly hoard.
- Make a mini comic of the most relatable moment you had this week (yes, even if it was eating over the sink).
The point isn’t perfection. The point is noticing your own life with kindness.
Bonus Add-On: of Real-Life “Private Things” Experiences
Here’s what’s funny about private habits: if you say them out loud, they sound like you’re confessing to being a cartoon character.
But when you hear someone else say the exact same thing, you instantly feel closer to humanity. That’s the emotional alchemy Oleander’s project captures.
For example, there’s the “kitchen concert” personthe one who can’t cook pasta without turning into a pop star the moment the water starts boiling.
They’ll sing one line of a song, forget the next seven lines, then confidently replace the lyrics with something like, “I’m adding garlic now!”
It’s not performance. It’s play. And it’s one of the easiest ways to shake off a stressful day.
Then there’s the “whisper pep-talk” habit. Some people quietly narrate encouragement to themselves while doing ordinary tasks:
“Okay, we’re going to fold laundry. You’re doing amazing.” It sounds silly until you realize it’s a self-kindness practice.
Nobody’s watching. Nobody’s grading you. It’s just you taking care of youlike being your own older sibling who shows up with snacks and good advice.
Another classic: the “comfort show loop.” The same series, the same episodes, the same predictable jokeson purpose.
Not because the person is out of new content, but because familiar stories can calm the nervous system.
There’s relief in knowing what happens next. It’s the emotional version of wearing your favorite hoodie.
And let’s not forget the “pet roommate” conversations. People will ask their dog how their day was.
They’ll apologize to their cat for walking too loudly. They’ll explain, in detail, why the vacuum cleaner must happen now, even if it’s unpopular.
Is it logical? Who cares. It’s affectionate. It turns a quiet home into a place that feels alive.
Some private things are about comfort, but some are about courage. Like practicing what you want to say before you say it.
Rehearsing a boundary in the mirror. Writing a message, deleting it, rewriting it, and finally hitting send.
These moments don’t look dramatic from the outside, but they’re huge internally. They’re proof that people are tryingtrying to communicate,
trying to heal, trying to be better than yesterday.
What makes these experiences “wholesome” isn’t that they’re always cute. It’s that they’re honest.
They show the private space where we reset, cope, and create small pockets of joy. And when an artist draws those pockets with tenderness,
it feels like being gently understood without having to explain yourself.
Conclusion: What 27 Wholesome Illustrations Remind Us About Being Human
Amanda Oleander’s “things people do in private” series works because it celebrates the parts of life that usually stay invisible:
the micro-rituals, the self-soothing, the quiet love, the goofy comfort behaviors that make us feel okay again.
The takeaway isn’t “Everyone is weird.” The takeaway is better: Everyone is human.
And behind closed doors, most humans are trying their best, finding small joy where they can, and doing little things that keep the world from feeling too heavy.